I survived bullying, did i?

First grade, my hair was cut into pixie all my classmates laughed at me and call me i was a boy in a girl uniform.

Second grade, i poop into my undies and i cant forget the disgust on their faces and nobody wants to eat lunch with me then.  Thanks to my teacher i sent home washed by her. But I met a friend that day and she became best ever since.

Fourth, i was moved into another section where all the girls whisper, stare and laugh at me. I never tell my mom that i never get to eat what she has packed me because theyre the one who taste it.  Even my teacher hates me, i flunk her math subject. I hate math. Everyday i wish schoolyear’s over i hate it when im going home pretending i enjoy my day at school.

Fifth and sixth grade, at last me and my best friend reunited and we had a group, at last i felt human again, a normal kid who wants a normal life, at last no one can touch me i have a bestfriend and gang who can protect me. They taught me how to dress, go shopping and cheat exams though i wasnt doing it. My math was okay and i became an honor student.

Freshman, another separation with my best friend, we have to go to another school, meaning a new struggle for me. The school is bigger than the old ones, which means scarier, new faces, new groups, new teachers. I was appealing to some guys higher than my year, i  always says no to their invites because that is the least thing i wanna do. I made a friend, she’s funny and she’s also weird like me but she talks too much. But One day i hang out with this guy inside the campus, someone saw us and claiming we were hugging each other. The news spread all over the campus, i feel like even the 5th graders knew me. Each day was a nightmare, how i wish to be transfer in the middle of the schoolyear. Wherever i am, some call me whore, slut, tramp, even guys wink at me and tell me to have a day with me, everybody thinks im easy because that prick also claim he had me. How could i tell them that he was not hugging me because he was trying to harass and asking me for a kiss? No one will believe me. I put my wall and stand against those people, i live that way. It was difficult to go to school when people wont stop gossiping. 

Sophomore, that issue died down when my parents already talked to the teachers. That guy was expelled. I made friends. 

Junior, i was transferred. Again. Switching to a new school. Again. The school was small. Odd. Few faces. Few teachers. But never underestimate it, boys were always ready to pick a fight, lots of girls were social climbers. Again, i i was appealing to boys, but i swore i will never again fall to every trap. This popular group call me abnormal because i cant help to stop myself from turning into a red face whenever im embarrassed and flattered. I cried hard every night. Turns out they became my friends and it was the year i had my first puppy love.

First 6 months of employment, coworkers invites me to parties only to found out i was going to pay for their drinks, they call me trying hard because i was insisting myself  with them, somebody throw out my stuff from our shared locker, whenever i need help they will make fun at me first, i eat lunch alone, they call me 

All my life, i asked myself am i weird? Stupid? Not pretty enough? Self pity is the slightest thing i could do but im close to.

The thing is you cannot get rid of that kind of people in the society but what you can do is not to let those bullies shape who you are neither your future. we are not weird, we are different cause all of us created unique by God, we are loved by our families, we have true friends who support us. Those kind of people wont have to effect us, and for me i wanna thank them cause i learn how to be strong, i live independently, i became a grateful person, i learn how to love my enemies, i was transformed from being haateful to a forgivable person and for that i am happy… i am happy for those who survive being bullied, you’re one of the most victorious i met, and for those who keeps on bullying someone i hope you find your peace, i hope you’re satisfied that every criticism makes you significant because every mess you do induce me not to be like you.


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